The Evil Twitter Egg Has Finally Cracked

Eggs, some people see them as a form of life for non-mammals, some see them as a form of breakfast and well, some Twitter users see them as a sign of an abusive Twitter account that violates their existence and safe place.

Yes, Eggs are evil.

Media Giphy

Whatever they are, hard-boiled, scrambled or fresh out of a Chicken; eggs are the symbol of everything dishonourable and corrupt. Eggs are sexist, homophobic, racist, transphobic, islamophobic, unpolitically correct and are properly bigoted Trump supporters too. Well, according to Twitter anyway.

In a move designed to annihilate hatefulness from the Twitter world, Twitter has got rid of all resemblement of eggs from its popular social media platform.


You see, eggs are heinous and corrupt, they have no place on a multicultural utopia like Twitter.

Twitters previous default “egg” avatar was a major reason so many nasty people used the social media platform to voice their disapproval and opinions. Twitter’s Egg avatar can also be blamed for world hunger and the rise of the Nazi’s.

Historically, bullies and trolls would often keep the egg avatar, spending less time personalizing their Twitter accounts and more time harassing other Twitter users, behind the safety of the Egg profile picture. With this in mind, Twitter has replaced the egg with a grey-on-grey gender-neutral head. Speaking of which. only Hen’s lay eggs, that’s not really gender equality, is it? That could be sexist, as well…


“We’ve noticed patterns of behaviour with accounts that are created only to harass others – often they don’t take the time to personalise their accounts,” a Twitter spokesperson explained. “This has created an association between the default egg profile photo and negative behaviour, which isn’t fair to people who are still new to Twitter and haven’t yet personalised their profile photo.”

Liberal and politically correct Twitter went to great lengths to explain how “inclusive” the new image was, while emphasizing it spent a lot of time working on the perfect head shape.

“We felt that the circle of the head in the figure still seemed masculine, even though it technically had no design characteristics to indicate that it was a man. … people have come to associate the circle head with masculinity.”

So, now we have a transsexual/gender non-conformist shadowy figure to contend with, all while ISIS accounts are still allowed to tweet death to infidels. We don’t know about you, but we think those eggs were a lot less menacing than those Twitter accounts of terror, don’t you?


Story by Michael Lee

Featured Photo Credit: Mshcdn

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