10 Ways in Which Recruiters Are Worse than ISIS

Forget ISIS, Recruiters are the real embodiment of evil and terrorism. While deadly ‘Lone Wolf’ attacks have become a daily occurrence by Islamic extremists in the western world, in the world of job applications and CV’s, Recruiters are the real threat to humanity and civilization.

So what is the difference between a beheading and a rejection email? Can you see the similarity between a mass execution and a Recruitment open day? Whatever its Burqa’s or Job Boards, there isn’t that much of a difference between an Islamic global terrorist organization and the Recruitment department.

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Barbaric, Immoral, dishonourable, corrupt and monstrous, and that’s just their good side. Here are 10 Ways in Which Recruiters Are Worse than ISIS. Watch your neck next time you send off that curriculum vitae of yours, Recruiters have a database of names and addresses you know, they know where you live!

1 – At least with ISIS you know where you stand with them. If you are an infidel there is a good chance you’ll find yourself blown to smithereens, unlike Recruiters, at least you won’t be left hanging around with uncertainty.

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2 – In fact, having a one on one with Jihadi John is far more an appealing prospect than sitting across from a resting bitch faced interviewer.

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3 – Most Job Seekers would rather hear “Allahu Akbar” screamed at them then yet another, “I’m sorry but unfortunately you have not been successful on this occasion’’ rejection email.

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4 – Recruiters are basically Digital Terrorists!

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5 – Like their ISIS brethren, Recruiters get some kind of sick pleasure by destroying the dreams and ambitions of innocent job seekers everywhere.

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6 – Do not let Recruitment jargon and propaganda fool you; at least with ISIS you know they want you dead and buried.

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7 – Recruiters will promise you the falsehood of Job prosperity and 73 virgins in Heaven before you feel the sharp blade of a machete on the back of your neck.

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8 – An AK-47 is far more superior than a loaded resume, apparently!

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9 – Do not let the beady eyes of interviewers fool you into submission; while you speak, they are planning on the right time to decapitate you.

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10 – Remember, Recruiters are on a crusade to ‘purify’ the career world by killing the hopes and desires of apostate applicants everywhere. Do not become a victim of these ‘Talent Acquisition’ terrorists!

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Story by Michael Lee

Featured Photo Credit – The Daily Signal

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