Hold Onto Your Broomsticks, Halloween 2018 Is Here!

Well well well, if it isn’t Satan’s version of Christmas today? If it’s not, then we don’t know what is. Indeed, it’s that time of year to either participate or just forget about Halloween… Now is the time to dress up as whatever you want! As your favourite superhero, as a total hooker, or just about anything but somebody else’s actual ethnicity so as to avoid the cultural appropriation police from the leftist mindset.

It’s probably best to leave your “MAGA” hat at home until after the November 6th midterm elections, just to be safe. Hell, maybe now could be the perfect time to wear it?! They’ll never know if you just dressed up as a Trump supporter in order to scare people.

Halloween, or ‘All Hallows’ Eve’, is historically a Pagan holiday involving human sacrifice, named after the Gaelic festival ‘Samhain’, celebrating the start of the ‘Winter Solstice’, but it has since been Christianized by the early church and marketed in the modern day to serve as any excuse to dress up like a total slut, or a demonic entity, or whatever your chosen outfit may be. Tonight is the night of significantly dark history, though…

This Irish turnip found in a museum in Ireland, is the original Jack-O-Lantern, before pumpkins took hold with modern-day Halloween. Source: Twitter

It’s truly a creative time, and trick or treating is surely the best part of it! We’ve long gone passed the dark history of human sacrifice… or as Wikileaks and PizzaGate have proven, remnants of these horrific practices still exist today, not just on Halloween.

So, when you decide to choose your outfit before going out tonight, just enjoy the festivities and forget all about the “pagan Satan-worshipping holiday” stuff if you do decide to participate, unless of course you’re a Satanist. Then by all means, go ahead.

Christian Russian MP, Vitaly Milonov, said that celebrating the holiday brings you closer to “Satan and suicide”, as it falls between the Autumn Equinox and Winter Solstice.

Former satanist turned pastor, John Ramirez, told CBN News, “I was a general to the kingdom of darkness in witchcraft. I would sit with the Devil and talk to him like I’m talking to you today. It was that kind of communication. It was that kind of relationship.”

John Ramirez adds that “Halloween isn’t just about costumes and candy – there’s a much darker reality.”

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On his blog he writes, “Halloween is often associated with the pagan concept of Samhain, the festival where ancient pagans believed that the worlds of the living and dead would have been thinly divided.”

“But, we have seen from the other ancient pagan festivals associated with Christmas and Easter that these pagan connections do not serve as a reason why we cannot celebrate a Christian holiday.”

So there you have it! All of this is worth keeping in mind when you decide to celebrate Halloween today, and everyone be safe out there and have a great Hallows’ Evening. P.S. – this is also Hillary Clinton’s last Halloween as a free lady… So by all means celebrate!

 

Brainstain, over and out!

Story by The Narrator

Featured Photo Credit: Blizzard News

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